The Quiet Picture

Sometimes when the conditions aren’t right, you shouldn’t even try to take the photograph because you will only end up with something that doesn’t quite work. I’ve learned the lesson to not take the image to some degree, but there are always times I can’t resist the temptation - basically, take the image against my better judgement and then hope that miraculously it works anyway. Well, it just doesn’t. It’s hard enough in ideal conditions so exactly how I figure that I would get any keepers in photographically poor conditions is beyond me… But at least I keep my options open and failure is definitely one of them!

One of my biggest failings as a photographer is that I don’t have a distinguishable style. I have a common nominator in many of my images, for example in my flower images I try to shoot the flower with extremely blurred background so that the only recognisable element is just the flower. But that is a technique, and although using a specific technique often creates the style, I don’t think that the technique should be something you can express in numbers - in my case, focal length, distance to subject, and aperture.But in any case, this is the kind of photography I like. I can’t help it if I like those pictures where I have technically succeeded in eliminating all other elements but the subject itself. Even in landscape photography, I welcome any chance to keep it simple but I just can’t seem to find the right balance.

A good example is this winter image I took in March. I was snowshoeing above the treeline in the mountains, it was all sunshine and blue skies and the moon in the sky. Now, every photographer knows that plain blue sky is boring, so it was a challenge to shoot the landscapes with sky in the frame and keep it interesting. I opted to try with the starburst effect with the sun (quite nice, but a lot of flare) and then I tried to use the moon. The problem was, the moon was quite high in the sky so in order to get the mountain and the moon in the frame, I needed to use short focal lengths. I was aware that the moon would end up quite small in the frame, but since those nice fluffy clouds just didn’t materialise, it’s all I had to work with. I got one image I was really pleased with. I was somewhat deflated to find out that other people confirmed what I had initially suspected but somehow ignored - the moon is too small in the sky, it doesn’t hold the interest required to pull off the vast expanse of sky, there are too many elements to make this a minimalistic composition that works but not enough elements to make this a good standard landscape. I’m not complaining that other people don’t “get” the image - the critique is fair. My problem is, I still like the image. Regardless of the failings, it’s still probably my favourite image from the whole winter.

Now, the big question is, who am I shooting for? For myself, or am I just trying to please everyone else? Well, I would like to take an image that pleases me and a lot of other people as well. I would like to take an image that is me, is technically solid, and that other people like. But the image I like the most is technically bad, photographers will see the technical mistake and non-photographers won’t like the image because of the technical mistake even if they can’t articulate what the mistake is.

I’ve also been advised to stick to my guns and keep taking pictures I like, the style will develop itself in the end. But where does that leave me? It leaves me with technically poor pictures with nothing else to save them. It leaves me with a “style” which amounts to nothing more than technical inferiority. How’s that for a cheering thought for the day.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m a little bit agoraphobic. I don’t really have a genuine fear of open spaces but I have noticed that I have a genuine tendency to prefer enclosed spaces - I’m not talking small closets, but wide closed spaces like forests or small lakes. Places like sea shores or big lakes - anything where all you see is a straight horizon - make me a bit uneasy. I just think that it’s unnatural, that’s all. I was born and raised by a lake where the opposing shore with all its forests was always visible. Maybe there’s a kind of security I unconsciously seek, just need to see the other side. Standing by the sea and looking out at the horizon requires faith to believe in the opposing shore but the only thing I seem to believe is what I see.

So it’s easy to explain why I love Sweden so much. There are small forest lakes a-plenty, not to mention the forests themselves. Maybe that’s why I almost take it personally when I see clear-cut forests - my security blanket is gone!My version of agoraphobia is often reflected in my photographs as well. The cynical view - and I never shy away from that - is that I’m just not very good with wideangle lenses so I take my landscapes with longer focal lengths to hide the fact. But the Freudian view is that I have no reason to learn to use wideangle lenses because the wide landscape just simply doesn’t appeal to me, period. I do take the occasional wide shot, but looking at my album, my best work is undoubtedly with the enclosed, intimate scenics. For a while back I toyed with the idea of bying the Sigma 15mm f2.8 diagonal fish-eye lens to help me out of my photographic slump, but now that I got my Canon 300mm f4L, I can’t see any reason to play with extreme wideangles anymore. The telephoto lens has opened up a new world for me where close-ups are possible like never before. Now I feel that I don’t need to re-invent myself anymore - the other side is right here.

The seaside image was taken in 2003 with Canon EOS 5, Tokina 20-35mm f2.8 lens @ wide end. I sold the lens last year.
The forest lake image was taken on Sunday with Canon 20D, 17-85mm @ 76mm (35mm equivalent 122mm). I’m keeping the lens.

I’m not used to waiting. I’m not a very patient person either. This often has a negative impact on my photos - I just don’t have the tolerance to sit and wait for the perfect conditions. I know better than to get angry at the cloud that gets in front of the sun, but I don’t always bother to wait until it moves away but give up the shoot instead or settle for the overcast light.But it gets worse if I have to wait for another person. Giving up waiting is just too rude so I sit there and wait… and wait… and start to boil inside and think of a thousand ways to pay back those endless minutes I have to waste of my time for absolutely nothing other than… waiting. And then when you finally do show up, at best what I do is to make a smart comment to let you know that I did not appreciate the waiting, but after that it’s all good. I don’t hold a grudge.

My point is that I don’t understand how people can be so inconsiderate of other people’s time. If you keep me waiting, it’s probably because you’re busy doing something else - getting ready. So for you it’s not a waste of time, for you it’s not idly sitting around and concentrating all your will power to stay calm and stay put. And when you finally are ready and show up, you might say you’re sorry you’re late, I hope you didn’t have to wait too long. Wait too long? How hard is that to figure out? We agreed to meet at a certain time and you show up late, it’s easy math! The thing is quite simple, I don’t want to grow old waiting. I will inevitably grow old anyway but I prefer to be busy while doing it.

While most people put on their bikini and headed to the beach to lie in the sun, I put on my boots and rainsuit and headed for a roadside ditch to shoot orchids. The passers-by might have wondered a little while I endured the swarms of mosquitos and biting flies and the personal sauna experience created by the rain suit in the merciless sunshine, but what won’t a photographer do for that picture? I’m sure that the sun worshippers had just as much fun as I did, although I suspect that my photos will last a bit longer than a tan line!

Since this was just about the first fine summer weekend we are having here, I was determined not let a small flu keep me inside. I set out driving and stopped to look every time something interesting showed up by the side of the road. I felt the effects, I was sweating all the time and my heart was beating faster than I would’ve liked it to. Then suddenly I heard thunder cracking in the distance and sure enough, a big dark cloud was approaching. Otherwise it was sunny and nice, so I decided to keep driving as long as the weather would allow, and I might even get nice images out of the weather conditions. At some point I stopped at a bog to check for flowers - I’m rather partial to orchids at the moment - and saw a big dark cloud in front of me and heard the thunder again… from behind me! I started turning around and saw no less than four separate storm fronts which either had been circling me all the time, or I had managed to drive away from them. No wonder I had been feeling so hot… but it wasn’t all fever, the oppressive heat preceding a thunder front had a lot to do with it as well! Just didn’t see it coming.